Though children do not drive, we still tell them to wear seatbelts. It stands to reason that though they will not drive today, this valuable lesson can save their lives. The lesson behind this analogy can be applied to Abstinence Only Education Programs in the United States. We hold the highest hopes that our children are not having sexual intercourse before marriage; however it is best to inform them of the safety precautions available as this information can also save their lives. It is best that when a knowing eye is not watching, as it cannot always be, children have the basic knowledge of how to protect themselves, even if they choose to partake in risky behavior.
There exists a significant difference between endorsing premarital sex and endorsing risky behavior and choices. People do not need to drink, smoke, or use drugs to survive. Sexuality is a symptom of the human condition. By preaching abstinence we are not encouraging values, we are asking our children to deny a part of themselves, their sexuality. Abstinence Only Education Programs teach children to refrain from sexual intercourse until marriage. The United States spent 141 million dollars in fiscal year 2008 on abstinence only education. It is interesting to note that, “a congressionally mandated study conducted by Mathematica Policy Research, Inc that showed students are just as likely to engage in sexual activity whether or not they participate in abstinence-education programs”[1]. With this investment, the rate of teen pregnancy in the United States is significantly higher than most other developed countries[2]. Studies also show, that the rate of teen pregnancy in schools that only utilize abstinence only teaching are similar to those schools where students were given further information. The significance lies in the availability and information on options for contraception and healthful protection. Abstinence-only sex education became more prominent in the U.S. over the last decade stimulated by over $1 billion in federal funding[3]. However, few long-term, rigorous studies have been done on these programs, and their effectiveness remains a matter of question… What is in dispute is whether abstinence-only sex education actually succeeds in increasing abstinence[4]. Public schools are not teaching children about masturbation or protected sex, we give students only one option to consider in the classroom when unfortunately the rest of the world bombards them with contradictory information.
Teen pregnancy is a symptom of larger social ills rather than the root cause, however it is important to understand the difference between what children are doing and why they are doing it. They are not falling in love at younger ages and choosing to have sex to express that affection. The choice to have sex has become more about bragging rights or social standing than about an expression of love and affection. Young men who do not get good grades, do not excel in extracurricular activities, or perform well at an after school job lack avenues to gage self worth. The current trend is to use sex and pregnancy as a method to demonstrate their successes. A young man who may not have any other opportunity to show his achievement, uses a pregnant partner as proof that he is both able to have a child and desirable to the opposite sex. The significant word here is “uses” because the interaction between the sexes is still underdeveloped. Rather than sharing values, responsibilities, or a sense of humor; the relationship element is removed. Young people are no longer learning about themselves or each other through adolescent relationships, they are treating one another as inanimate objects with no feeling or intrinsic value.
Young women are having sex to show that they are desirable and the presence of a child in some schools is a badge of honor. The child is proof that the young woman is desirable and therefore popular. In Lorain (Ohio) city schools, conversation of the 5th grade girls exemplifies this misguided value system. Female students frequently argue over who has had sex first. The winning argument in a particular case, “Well it don’t matter, I’ll still be the first one to have sex before I get my period.” This declaration clearly exemplifies a disconnect between the value of attention and self worth. Female students (9 to 10 years old) see no difference between positive attention and negative attention. Seeking only the ends they do not consider the means. This group does not realize, nor do they have access to positive examples of adult love and affection. Starved for affection they see sex as an opportunity to prove their worth, rather than seeing it as an expression of love to be shared with someone they truly care about. Boys are not even mentioned, which shows that there is no tie between sex and a person. The act has become removed from both the self and the sharing of the physical body to demonstrate emotional love or even basic affection.
In children’s minds the act of sex has nothing to do with emotion, particular individuals, or even sexual satisfaction. Sex is a tool that is used to win a competition. The problem with this competition is that no one wins. There is no sharing between the boy and girl beyond bodily fluids. There is no mention of protected sex which further increases the likelihood of early pregnancy or contraction of sexually transmitted diseases. There is also no discussion of wants and needs. Sex has been reduced to a flat example of experience rather than a desire to learn more about another person or one’s self. This in turn practically guarantees that the experience will be unpleasant at best, which takes away from the enjoyment of the act but also the opportunity to attach greater value to the event.
By suggesting that abstinence is the only answer educators and parents are loosing a valuable opportunity for open conversation with children. We know children naturally test their limits, by being the only silent voice we are not giving them the opportunity to make educated decisions. We are taking away their access to information, which they have proven repeatedly that they will seek out. Sex is glorified in today’s society, however sex as an exhibition of titillating primarily male focused stereotypes. The deeper meaning behind the act is distinctly separated from the expression of sexiness, provocative language or dress, and the illusion of seduction. Replicating this popular image has taken center stage, whereas a fulfilling sexual experience becomes secondary to looking the part. With schools only providing an abstract concept of “good” or “right” behavior, we are denying the reality in which our children grow up.
Young girls glorifying sex are not the ideal role models for our children. This teaches female children that their value is only in their physical appearance, provocative dress, or ability to produce children. It teaches male children to objectify women and only value what can be gained from them physically. As voters it is our responsibility to provide the greatest and most balanced education for our children. We cannot ask our children to stay in school, pursue competitive careers, or make a difference in their communities if they are busy raising their own children due to our negligence.
Legislation is needed to revise the outdated, paternalistic, and religious right interpretation of health education in our public schools. By not informing our children of how pregnancy occurs, what the consequences of their actions may be, or what they can do to take precautions; we are asking them to find their own answers. A quarter of teens aged 15 to 17 have not discussed sex with a parent or guardian[5]. Every day our children’s minds are saturated with advertisements and subliminal messaging that tells them that it is expected and acceptable to attach interpretations of self worth to physical appearance, that the expression of sexual images is more important that the sharing of thoughts, friendship, or ideas, and that sex is an activity in which anyone can partake. The inverse information is not advertised with the same intensity. Data revealing that one in four sexually active teenagers will contract an STD[6]. We do children in this country a great disservice by not providing them with access to open conversation and the availability of healthful protection for those that choose to become sexually active. Though they will ride in cars with or without parental supervision, we encourage them to buckle up. We need to offer the same guidance to children and provide safe sex education in our public schools.
For further information:
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/8470845/
http://www.slate.com/id/2140985/
http://www.religionandsocialpolicy.org/news/article.cfm?id=6632
